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A word from … Aubren Self

Editor’s note: Aubren Self is FRCS’s College Guidance Counselor

School Year’s Eve

School is back in full swing, and this time of year always reminds me why rhythms are so important.

Right now, we’re caught up in the back-to-school cadence: what should kids take to school, how to fill their backpacks, double-checking homework is complete, and making sure forms are turned in. We’re thinking about the right classes, the right clothes, the right friends, and which after-school activities would be best.

These thoughts can be all-consuming for me. I’m a checklist-loving, color-coded calendar kind of mom. But this year, God placed something on my heart: what may be even more important than preparing our kids for school is preparing the home to which they return.

Not a perfect home. Not a Pinterest-worthy home. But a home where we intentionally establish simple practices and traditions that cultivate deeper connection with one another and create rhythms where faith is being formed deeply enough that, when it is challenged, our kids know what to do.

After a fast and fun-filled summer, we wanted to be intentional about what a routine reset would look like for our family. We decided to kick off the school year with a made-up holiday called School Year’s Eve. I’ve watched some friends do this, and I have a feeling it’s going to become a family favorite.

You see, our son is highly relational and places a lot of value on shared experiences. He loves creating an environment with purpose (which, of course, always includes dressing the part!) and thrives on intentional transitions.

Our daughter is a little different. She loves quality time and really good food. She needs us to slow down, sit together, and make a moment feel special. All that to say, it was important for our son to have a way to say goodbye to summer and hello to a new school year. Our daughter mostly enjoyed the extra-long time at the table since she usually takes forever to finish her food anyway.

School Year’s Eve was nothing elaborate. It wasn’t Instagram-worthy. But sometimes the simplest traditions are the ones our kids remember most.

Our new tradition meant breakfast for dinner and time spent talking about wrapping up the best summer yet and launching into a new school year. The kids shared what made them both excited and nervous for the months ahead.

Each child also had a paper with space to write their goals for the school year, a section for family members to write something they see, admire, or believe about them, and a section to finish the sentence, “I like it when…” It gave us a little window into the things that make them feel loved, encouraged, seen, and known.

Please hear me: this isn’t a post to tell you that you need to start a School Year’s Eve tradition. And it certainly isn’t meant to make you feel guilty about the things you may or may not be doing. It’s simply an encouragement to evaluate the small things you do already, or family traditions you’ve already established and how these rhythms shape your home. Maybe you’ll borrow an idea. Maybe you’ll begin something new.

Need a place to start? The table: eat together. Just make space to regularly sit across from each other and tell stories; pick up some family conversation cards; play a three-minute podcast with a family devotional (if you have littles, we love Pebbles); post Scripture around your house; read a few verses or a Bible story before bed.

It doesn’t need to be impressive. It just needs to become familiar.

These traditions do more than create fun memories (and a lot of work for parents!). They anchor our families. They establish healthy rhythms, create connection, and give our kids something to look forward to.

Some of ours have been built over the years, and some are simple and silly. Whether you grew up with a million traditions or none, start where you are and use what you have. Pay attention to what brings your people together.

My husband and I came from families that have very different traditions. His family bonded over good food and movies, while mine centered around sports and experiences. Neither is better, but it has been fun to take pieces of both, add our own ideas, and create traditions that work for our family.

My prayer for all of us is that we build homes where our kids can tell us what they heard at school and what’s on their heart.

Here are some simple ideas for those who need a little inspiration: